“They only expect me to help. They say givers never lack, but who cares for you when you’ve emptied yourself?” X Influencer, WizArab

Recent conversations on X aboutCaring for the Carer went viral, sparking an necessary query: Who exhibits up for the one that exhibits up for everybody?

One factor grew to become clear from the conversations: care is deeply woven into Nigerian society. From breadwinners shouldering the monetary tasks of each their nuclear and prolonged households to firstborns searching for his or her youthful siblings to medical professionals and academics whose careers are constructed round caring for others, a lot of our society rests on the shoulders of people that present up for others. But whereas we recognise and rejoice their sacrifices, one query stays:Who cares for the carers of our society?

An AXA Mansard movie, recreated by Ikorodu Bois, brings this query to life by means of the emotional story of Pere, a fisherman torn between caring for his sick mom and offering for his or her wants. His story captures a well-recognized actuality: the burden of caring for another person, even when you’ve your individual struggles. At its coronary heart is an easy however highly effective query: Who cares for the carer?

Because everyone knows that particular person. The one who at all times appears to have the solutions. The one who picks up at 2 am. The one who says, “Don’t worry, I’ll sort it out,” earlier than you have even completed explaining the issue. We love them. We admire them. We proudly inform folks about them. “Ah, my sister is so strong.” “My dad is a rock.” “That friend of mine, she’s too responsible.”

But someplace between celebrating their energy and counting on their dependability, we will overlook that they, too, want somebody to lean on.

Are We Too Good At Being Good?

Let’s be truthful. Nigerians are a communal folks, and care is deeply ingrained in our tradition. A firstborn worrying about secondary and college faculty charges. We have folks within the society who present up for us: from contributing to burial bills and weddings to paying for hospital payments. We assist family members we have by no means even met. Community is a part of who we’re, and that’s stunning. It is one thing price holding on to.

But maybe there’s one other facet to our tradition of accountability that we’re not seeing and Nigerians are talking up. In a society the place exhibiting up for others is anticipated and celebrated, asking for assist can really feel virtually like a failure. The particular person everybody depends on might discover it hardest to confess they’re struggling, too.

So Here’s Your Homework

Think about these folks;

The one you at all times name.
The one who at all times sends cash.
The one who at all times solves the issue.
The one who at all times says “I’m fine.”
The one who’s at all times obtainable for everyone besides themselves.

You know precisely who got here to thoughts.

What actionable step are you going to take to ensure they’re cared for? Because the reality is, the one that is at all times there for you is ready for somebody to be there for them.